Memorial Day 2021 or Why I Need a New Car

I used to like my teeny-weeny Chevy Volt that I have been driving for 6 years. It’s a good car, cheap as heck to run. I can drive more than 275 miles on 8 gallons of gas on the freeway, way more than that on city streets. It also has an electric charge of 35 miles, and I barely use the gas if making short trips around town. I average 100mpg. It has 4 blind spots. This week I discover it has a blind spot in the blind spot. How could that be, you ask? I turn my neck as far as it goes and then a car is where I can’t see it because it’s in the new blind spot. I cut people off a lot which is a good way to get killed or maimed in California.

A couple of weeks ago the driver window freezes in the open position. I have it repaired. In less than a week, it breaks again. The window opens when I stop the engine, makes dreadful noises, stays down. In order to get it to stay closed, I leave the car running and climb out through the passenger door. I do this a few times and begin leaving the window wide open, unlocked with the keys in the car to see if anyone would steal it. Alas, no one does. Today, this momentous Memorial Day, en route to Arcata, Gretchen, my 16-year-old cat, and I set out for the 5-hour, 250-milet drive to Humboldt County. Some of us call it “Behind the Redwood Curtain.” Of late, there are bougie wine bars, upscale shops, and my favorite: Axe and beer. That right, while drinking, one throws axes at a wall.

Gretchen and I get as far as Healdsburg. I need to pee and get a sandwich. I park in the Safeway lot…